Couldn't happen to a nicer guy!
It is with great humility that I announce that TIME magazine has just appointed yours truly as "Person of the Year." In their public statement, the periodical cited me for "seizing the reins of the global media, for founding and framing the new digital democracy, [and] for working for nothing and beating the pros at their own game."
I should also takes pains to mention, that I am consigned to sharing this award with everyone else on the planet who has a computer with internet access. But at least, just this once, I can see my face on the cover of TIME. So can my esteemed fellow-awardees. Just pick it up at your friendly neighborhood newsstand to see how they pull it off.
(And to think that if I had been in the audience on Oprah one particular day, I would have won a car along with everyone else. Ah, but a man can dream...)