Monday, December 09, 2013

“I read the news today, oh boy ...” (“Being John Malkovich” Edition)

(No kidding, he's sixty years old today. now then ...)

Today we celebrate the return of Cincinnati's own Uncle Jay -- you know, the guy who "explains the news" to the information-overloaded masses yearning to get to the point. Actually, the J-Man returned late last October from a long hiatus involving some nonsense about his day job, and he didn't even bother to tell us. Now, if he can just keep things going for the foreseeable future, we'll keep him here as a regular at the Black Hat Corral. How 'bout it, Jay?

Meanwhile, elsewhere on planet Earth:

Pastor Mike Butzberger of Lighthouse Baptist Church in North Palm Beach, Florida, wants to make a point about how hypersensitive we all are, just looking for an excuse to be offended by something. And what better time of the year to offend as many of us as possible! [Yahoo! News]

That's right, kids, there's plenty of offending to go around this holiday season, as a school district in Texas bans the very mention of Christmas, including the use of red and green. Too bad one of those colors is used on the state flag. Who knew? [Fox News]

Meanwhile, in the enlightened city of Portland, Oregon, a little girl raising money for her dental braces is told by police that she can't sell mistletoe, but she can panhandle. [Political Outcast]

Speaking of cashing in, a suburban Nashville couple at a McDonalds drive-thru got more than fries with that, whatever that was. [AP]

It has recently been disclosed that the Russians attempted to land a craft on the moon just hours before the Americans with Apollo 11. Here's why no one lived to tell about it. [Telegraph]

Finally, the late South African president Nelson Mandela, civil rights activist and (while we're at it) author of one of the most devastating pro-abortion laws in human history, has left an enormous legacy, and everybody wants a piece of it. Can you say, ka-ching??? [Reuters]

And that's all the news that fits. As the week goes on, stay tuned, and stay in touch.

(Next week: Uncle Jay explains Can't wait to see that one!)

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