“I read the news today, oh boy ...” (National Punctuation Day Edition)

The White House finally came clean about those "little" embassy protests. Also, did striking Chicago teachers idolize an anti-gay bigot? Hear the details about these stories, plus Obama's lavish party with Jay-Z and Beyoncé, from the folks at Pajamas Media.

If you want to know more about the "scary-@$$ chart of the week" (and you really do), click here. Meanwhile, elsewhere on planet Earth.

• He was living in British Columbia, going on with his life. She was from Ireland. They only met for two minutes, and she was gone. That was not enough for him, and so, in the words of Sherlock Holmes: "The game is afoot!" (The Independent)

• And speaking of impending heartbreak, this sounds familiar, doesn't it? A 77-year-old Montreal man won $16.9 million in the lottery in 2009, but his life since has been mired with lawsuits and untimely deaths in his family (Sun News)

• Think it couldn't be worse? Well, brace yourselves! A guy in Washington state has been charged with stealing a rare coin collection worth $100,000 and spending the coins at face value on a movie and pizza with his girlfriend. (The Columbian)

• And speaking of priorities, a father in Massachusetts is upset with his daughter's school. Seems she injured herself in gym class, and they called him before calling 911. Can you say "protocol"? (WCVB-TV)

• Finally, are you one of those people who thinks an ellipsis is when the moon moves in front of the sun? Then be warned that this is National Punctuation Day, when we stop and take a moment to recognize the importance in our lives, of crossing those T's and dotting those I's. "Every jot and tittle" has its place in keeping our world from descending into total chaos. And who other than those jokers at Occupy Wall Street wants that anyway? (Wikipedia)

That's all the news that fits. As the week goes on, stay tuned, and stay in touch.