Yo, Faddah! Youse gotta plane ta catch, huh?

John Schultz of Catholic Light has this concern:

"I know a priest who insists that every verse of every hymn is sung for hymns/songs picked for the liturgy... I believe the reason he does it is that he considers most hymns to be complete prayers... Let me know if you have any thoughts, please."

You call that a problem, John? I'll tell you a problem. It's the priests who think they have to bolt down the main aisle at the first bar of the opening hymn, get in place before the first verse is over, and spend two or three verses just standing up there, like birdies in the wilderness. If they had any class, they would simply wait until the first verse is over before nudging the altar boys down the runway, walk with some awareness of the formality of the occasion, thus using the processional hymn for... well, processing. What a concept!

Some of these guys are the same ones who admonish us for wanting to duck out before the closing hymn is over. I say they're just jealous because we've got a head-start.

John's not the only guy on top of things. His brother Steve, also at Catholic Light (proving that astuteness runs in the family), is compiling a list of "reform" groups. Meanwhile, Disputations, operated by one identified only as "Capax Dei," has founded one known as Reform the Hell out of The Church. Obviously he has discovered what the rest of us have missed:

"...good-for-nothing bishops; priests who do not humbly accept criticism; poor congregational singing; noisy children and the parents who spoil them; parking lot traffic snarls between the 8 a.m. and 10 a.m. Masses on Palm Sunday; anything to do with Massachusetts politics; and youth ministers."

Oh, another thing, Cap: bishops who outlaw bingo! What are they thinking? How are we gonna pay for all the lawyers???

Now... where can I run like Hell to sign up?