"I read the news today, oh boy..."

According to the latest edition of the American Journal of Public Health:

"At every age, American males have poorer health and a higher death rate than their female counterparts, says David R. Williams, a senior research scientist at the University of Michigan Institute for Social Research... If you take the 15 leading causes of death in the United States, men come in first in all but one, Alzheimer's disease. Their death rates are at least twice as high as women for suicide, homicide, cirrhosis of the liver, and accidents.

"Those numbers hint that there are men who are not following the rules of healthy, lawful behavior, Williams acknowledges. More important, he says, is that the American picture of the macho man leads to destructive behavior.

"'A good example is how men respond to stress,' he says. 'Women are more likely than men to seek social support, particularly from other women. Men are more likely to believe that any expression of distress shows their susceptibility, so they are more likely to turn to substances...'"

Great news, huh?

Now that spring is here, and a young man's fancy turns to thoughts of -- well, the usual -- we'll be taking an occasional look at relationship issues. Not just romantic ones, and not just male/female interaction. Although that will be most of it.

Most important, "...one real demand, Williams says, is that 'we need a new definition of masculinity that includes greater responsibility for oneself.'"

In other words, men still need their mommies. (Just in time for Mother's Day.) Of course, women still go after the bad boys who remind them of their workaholic alcoholic fathers. Don't ask me which is worse.

I figure, what the hell, if Thomas Aquinas can be dubbed an expert on sexual morality for over a millennia, then a divorced over-aged party animal can take a stab at the periphery of the subject.

Miss Bonnaci, eat your heart out!