Jesus is just all, right?

Then the sad drunk at the end of the bar roused from his slumber and spoke to them in parables, saying thus:

The kingdom of heaven is like a drunken man walking down the railroad tracks at night. His foot caught on a spike that had pulled up out of one of the ties, and he fell across the tracks. As he landed, he dragged his hand across the tie, and got a splinter in one of his fingers.

Then a train came along, and ran over him, cutting off his legs. The engineer saw him too late to stop, but he radioed for help. A Paramedic was nearby, heard the call on his scanner, and drove over to help.

When the Paramedic arrived, he rushed over to the drunken man to lash a tourniquet around the stumps of his legs. But before he could begin, the drunken man grabbed him by the arm, and said, "Thank God you’re here! Look at this splinter! I hope you’ve got tweezers; this thing is killing me."

Those who have ears, let them hear.

-- from the Gospel according to Jim Nicholson of The Boar's Head Tavern
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