"Mommy, what does 'fornicating' mean?"

I had that little quotation running through my head one Sunday morning a few years ago, after attending Mass at another parish. The priest-homilist had the right idea, I suppose, objecting to "young couples who fornicate before they are married." But he definitely picked the wrong setting.

My own psycho-sexual development was probably way behind the average kid in my neighborhood. I can remember as an eighth-grader, looking up the word "rape" in the dictionary, and still not being able to grasp the concept. But years before that, I knew from my catechism about what was called "purity in thought, word, and deed." That, and my parents' ability to discern how much I could handle and when, was enough to spare me from a close call when I was in high school ("My Charismatic Moment," August 1, 2002).

Alas, it's not going to be simple for the local Diocese of Arlington. No, they feel the need to implement a "Good Touch, Bad Touch" program to little children, because some pencil-pushing experts in Washington think that's going to solve the crisis of clerical sexual abuse. Of course, they could try introducing a program to the priests first, about dealing with their sexuality in the context of the celibate life. They would, unless they're convinced the children and their parents are the ones with the problem. But no, they have to do things the hard way. That's how a few diocesan officials appeared to have been asking for trouble at a presentation in Manassas last Monday night. An article in The Washington Times described the scene...

"In a four-hour hearing ending at 11 pm, a majority of the 230 people at All Saints Catholic Church hooted, booed and hurled catcalls at a handful of diocesan employees, who defended the program.... Parents complained that 'Good Touch, Bad Touch' was inappropriate for young children, that parents had little or no input in selecting the program and that the true problem was abusive clerics, not children."

Well, what in Sam Hill did "a handful of diocesan employees" expect? Some of their minions have tried ramming "family life education programs" down the throats of parents in the past, and refusing parents the option of pulling their kids out. Did the folks downtown think everybody was about to let them off the hook a few years later?

I still can't get over the fact that my son was in a co-ed gym class in the public schools as early as the seventh grade. Now, Paul has always been relatively ahead on the learning curve for this subject. But not all children are. Some who are not can be traumatized by the embarrassment of sharing of such information while among their peers, especially young girls, and MOST especially in a mixed audience.

If anybody in charge ever reads this (a long shot, if ever there was one), they might go out on a limb and try a little thing called COMMON SENSE. To begin with, a 1995 document from the Holy See entitled The Truth and Meaning of Human Sexuality specifies that parents "are the first and foremost educators of their children" on chastity. (What? In writing?? Do you realize what could happen if anybody with a sixth-grade reading level got a hold of this???) So why not introduce a program for the parents, and leave it to them to disseminate it to the children? The immediate answer, at least the one I've heard before, is that the parents don't always do the job of passing the information along, and (like a lot of other things) leave it to the schools to do it. One eighth-grade teacher of a Catholic school told me of parents who were actually relieved that the school was doing their job for them. Then there are those who put it off until just before their kids' wedding nights...

Whether parents like it or not, the pastors of the Church have a teaching role in this matter. But it's supposed to be directed at the parents first. (There I go, applying the Natural Law again. When will I ever learn?)

By the way, weren't we the generation that was supposed to be so open and honest about sex?

(Note to my friends at Catholic Lite: If certain representatives of the diocese hadn't already established a reputation for insulting the intelligence of those whom they serve, there wouldn't be a bunch of rosary-slinging yahoos raising hell in the first place. You sow the wind, you reap the whirlwind.)